The whole kit & doodle!

Why are we apologizing for our emotions?

So again, I've spent a good portion of time reading on various adoption discussion forums. I continually come across statements similar to the following:

  • "I know I am being dramatic and at 31 years of age should be able to put the anger behind me. I'm working on it." – from a woman expressing anger towards her birth father and adoptive mother.
  • "I feel dramatic about it too, I'll be 27 in a couple of months and I feel like I'm living in the past"
  • "I know I should get over this."
  • "I realize I should just let this go."
  • "I know this is irrational."

Why on earth are we minimalizing our emotions like this? Why are we buying into the idea that our emotions are trivial, or as if we have no right to feel what we feel?
Who says? Who made up these rules and why do we feel we have to follow them? Who gave 'them' that right?

It sure as hell wasn't me. I doubt it was any of you, either.

The hell with the rules. These are our emotions, our feelings, and we are entitled to them.

If you catch me apologizing or making excuses for what I'm feeling, kick me in the pants, will you?


December 13, 2005 - Posted by | Adoption Void


  1. I promise to kick you for apologizing for your emotions.

    Comment by Wraiths | December 14, 2005 | Reply

  2. Ah, yes, me too, if you apologize for what you’re feeling, I will kick you too! Nah, actually I will tell you that you have a right to your feelings.

    Comment by Cookie | January 4, 2006 | Reply

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